May Day!

I had lots of thoughts for this weeks update, but they've been trumped by the events of the weekend. A very experienced and darn good runner (certainly a lot better than me, for a reference point) from LMCO remained in the hospital the last I knew after failing to finish the Mountain Goat. After I failed in my own way, to finish Sunday, I had a chance to see 90% of the 10 milers go past my vantage point at the 9.75 mile mark. I saw one guy collapse and sort of helped him (a couple others beat me to him) and I got to see how he responded to the paramedics and that he was obviously incoherent and uncooperative to the point of his own detriment. And it got me thinking...is this all worth it? Is this even remotely healthy what we put ourselves through on a day like this? Is this sort of event that a community should encourage? And that was before I learned about my co-worker and the fact that he was still not doing well in the hospital today. So, I've gotten the message and want to make sure that I pass it on.

At times I've felt sorry for myself for having my condition where I can't push myself to the brink of exhaustion like I used to during the days of my youth. My elevated heart rate and weakened pulse forces me to tap out and walk before I would choose to. The first couple times it was very much a blow to my ego. And as I'm walking off to the side of the course as hundreds of people "I should be beating" run by, it's a very frustrating experience. All the training down the tubes. The goal and the glory of finishing 187th eluding me, yet again. :-(

But, you know what? After a couple times, you get over it. The humility turns into clarity - it doesn't matter. The race doesn't care about any one of us. None among us is going to win. (Well, Katie and Malinda being the exception in certain local races, but they don't count...they are getting kicked out of TRY soon. Shhhh! Don't tell them.) None of us are professional runners. We are engineers and IT professionals. Pharmacists and teachers. Elderly care providers and male strippers (part time, for extra spending money. Don't judge me! Times are tough, you do what you have to in order to get by.) So, if the race day isn't going how you planned it in your mind...think about why you are out there. You are out there to have fun. Know your limits. Stop and drink the power ade. The extra few seconds aren't going to matter. Walking isn't going to ruin your life. Doing worse than you did last year isn't going to cause your momma to look down on you. Getting beat by someone who never should beat you isn't going to get you fired from work. We sign ourselves up for these races and we talk ourselves into exactly how fast we need to run them in order to be happy with ourselves. We want the age group awards. We want that shiny medal. We want to wear the shirt with pride so we can tell people the story about it. But it's all just silly selfishness. 2000+ people could care less that I limped off the course and hobbled back the way I came. Sure, I made a personal ceremony out of unpinning my race number and tucking it in my pocket. And I'll always remember that the guy was singing Toby's "She's my little whiskey girl" as I did it. But no one else cared. The race didn't stop. The goats didn't stop grazing. Colvin didn't get any less daunting. Ronnie Z didn't stop Tik-Tok-ing. (Wait, he didn't sing? I thought maybe I just didn't see him?) The only person it mattered to was myself. And I'm over it.

So, I'm proud of the people who walked for the first time. And I'm proud of those of you who went slower than you wanted to and faded in the second half. Your first career DNF? Good for you! You knew your limit. You knew this is just something you do for fun. A hobby you do after work and on the weekends. And you saved yourself so that you can do it after work this Tuesday and so you can do it again this weekend.

If you are injured? Or if you are physically exhausted? Slow down. Walk. Stop if you have to. No one will judge you for it as long as you don't judge yourself.

(Wow, that got long! Maybe I am finally feeling better and back to my old wordy self?!!!)

For tonight - let's see who shows up. A few people will be nursing post race soreness and may need a recovery week. So, a "game time decision" run is in order and we'll group up according to like minded runners.

More Sunday thoughts - many of you did better and better the more I've heard about the conditions. Definitely 2 to 4 or more minutes were lost out there. So, while you can't "count" that at least keep it in mind at how much better that time would seem if you took 3 minutes off of it. Excellent performances amongst the TRYers! Including peoples first tastes of the Goat.

Mark and Katie -- thanks for hosting what might be becoming a Mountain Goat tradition -- the nice post race gathering at your place. That was very much appreciated! And I've figured something out...next year when the opening gun is fired, I'm going to immediately turn around and just walk to your house. No need to bother with the course itself. And since I'm going to be walking anyway, I might as well head to my final destination. And while I figured, it would be close -- check this out - my random pin placements came up as exactly 10.0 miles. (Seriously, I didn't even cheat. Dead serious! I'm as shocked as anyone is...although I'm sure I'm slightly off where I dropped the pins. Pretty funny though.)

Ok, I'm saving anything useful for another week. :-(